i will be everything i have the potential to be.
listen to Happy By Natasha Beddingfield
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
How incredible. Makes me want to get an engineering degree and work there!
| Fortune Magazine recently named Google the #1 company to work for, a ranking based largely on Google's well-publicized employee perks: free meals in its gourmet cafeteria; on-site doctors, dry cleaners, and gym facilities; and even a policy that allows employees to bring their pets to work. But the benefits of "Googlers" don't end there. The following list of lesser-heralded employee perks should provide an idea of just how far Google goes to keep the human pistons of its search engine pumping contentedly.  1. Google provides free custom detailing on all employee-owned Segways, motorized scooters, recumbent bicycles, and other widely-derided modes of transportation. 2. For recent computer science grads accepting an engineering position with Google, a popular social event is Google's "New Employee Orientation and Arranged Virginity-Loss Night."  3. Google employees who are about to become mothers receive 12 weeks of maternity leave; aging female engineers now coming to terms with the fact they will likely never be mothers receive two weeks of "Crushing Sense of Incompleteness Leave." (It is 50% paid.) 4. Googlers enjoy an Employee Referral Program â€" meaning, they receive a cash bonus if they refer management to any employee even thinking about leaving Google. 5. For all Google employees who've just committed a crime of passion, Google provides a two-bedroom safehouse just outside the city where said employee can lay low until "the heat" dies down.  6. Google affords all employees a $1500 monthly stipend for mandatory lava lamp purchases.  7. Google employees can commute to work via free company shuttle; it is piloted by retired colonel Buzz Aldrin. 8. To encourage collaboration, the hallways at Google are lined with whiteboards where employees can jot down ideas. To encourage active collaboration, these whiteboards are dusted with cocaine.
10. To help relieve the stress of being tied to their computers for such long hours, Google provides employees with free online-based massage therapy.  11. Each new grain of sand in Google's beach volleyball pit is imported via extraction from the bikini ofRachel Wacholder. 12. Google offers a unique "literal 401k" retirement plan; for every dollar an employee invests, Googlematches it with $401,000.
14. Googlers can enjoy fruit smoothies via osmosis in one of several on-campus Jamba Baths.  15. New Google employees each receive a keepsake Google hacky-sack filled with pulverized sapphires. 16. At Google's summer picnic the employees don't play softball or soccer â€" they hunt homeless men for sport. 17. Google's college intern recruitment video was written by J.D. Salinger and directed by Sidney Lumet.18. At Halloween, Google sponsors a costume contest for engineers who dress up as their favorite line of code. 19. Google employees receive personal mentoring sessions with co-founder Sergey Brin, or at least one of the eight Brin replicants built in late 2005.20. Employees are given beta test runs of exciting new Google software, such as the satellite imaging program Google Maps-of-Gisele's Bedroom and the adult singles-finding service Gspots.  21. The barista at Google's on-campus café is Juan Valdez. (Not the coffee brand icon — just a Latin dude named Juan who happens to make a really great latte.) 22. Google offers training and assistance to all employees planning to journey behind enemy lines in an attempt to rescue their POW fathers.  23. Google arranged that their regular opponent in corporate league basketball is always the team from Washington Generals, Inc. (To date, Google is a combined 238-0.) 24. Google engineers are given "20 percent time" in which they are free to pursue their own personal projects. This incentive has produced such efforts as Gmail, Google News, and 20% more employeemasturbation. 25. Google provides free financial planning classes to all its employees. The session consists of just one tip: "Remember â€" Google. Fucking. OWNS You." |
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
have i told you lately that i love you?
do you ever obsess about not being able to find The One before it's too late? do you think that everyone has a soulmate, but you may be the exception to that universal rule? or maybe that you may found The One but stupidly you let him/her go? that you were young and too stupid to even realize that what you had together was one thing that would stand the test of time?
well that keeps me awake sometimes. along with thoughts about what happens after death? where do we go after we die? do we have souls? does God really exist or is it just the brilliance of the human mind, trying to console and 'prepare' ourselves to cope with the unknown?
an aside-those people who write books after the afterlife, how can they claim to know these things? it just seems so ludicrous! they haven't died, or have they found the special power to come back from the dead? no i am not talking about the teachings of religion, because those are written by prophets or God's messengers. i'm talking about the New Age crap people churn out so much these days. they title their books so weirdly, 'unleash the soul within'. what upstarts!
so back to the weighty matters of the world. doesn't not knowing just piss you off? that you have to wait and see how things pan out for you? you have to be patient to wait for God's great plan to come into reality? for people who are as impatient as i am, this just does not work out! the not knowing, the suspense, the agony of waiting, the pain of not knowing whether the choice you made is the right one just slowly devours you, your temper gets shorter, your sleep gets interrupted.... and life just goes on its merry little way. not caring whether or not you can pick yourself up, dust yourself down and continue.
life is an unmerciful master, it goes whether or not you are ready for it, doesn't give two figs about whether you want to continue.. it drags you kicking and screaming forward, piles on more hardship, more pain, more doubt until one day...
....you realize that you are being a big baby, and that life was merely toughening you up, giving you stones so that you can deal with the rocks. (nice metaphor there huh?)
that there is really no gain without pain.
when you are impatient, life teaches you patience.
when you are short tempered, life gives you tolerance.
when you have loved and lost, life gives you distractions.
when you have come to a crossroad, life gives u signs that you ignore.
when you are near death, life gives you loved ones to care and love you.
when you are spent from life, life gives you peace, it finally gives you what you want-a break.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
three cheers to my roomie for giving me this!
If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces,
Never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up
and Begin Again.
for those people who feel their dreams have been shattered, their hopes lost.. let those three lines give you faith.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Monday, May 4, 2009
JOSHUA'S BIRTHDAY!! may he have plentiful bubbles in his life.
what an eventful weekend, practically took it and threw it down the drain if u consider the amount of unconstructive things i have done. yes unconstructive is not a word but my brain is not working well enough for me to delve deep into the deep recesses of my vocab to substitute it with a better suited word. wow see, delve and recesses are big words eh.
okay sudden brain death. i will edit this entry soon.
but the main message is
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSHY BOY!
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